Venting

My brother came to live with me, again, because he was homeless and had nowhere else to go, again.

He got kicked out of the place he was staying for disturbing the peace.  And he got kicked out of the place he lived before that for living there illegally.  Before that he was in Caribou*.  Before that he was here.  Before that he was squatting in the abandoned house around the corner.  Before that he was here.  Before that he was with a girlfriend.  The pattern is clear- He is going to end up living with me forever.  And he doesn't contribute financially to the household- he isn't normal like that, never has been.

The truth is, my brother is autistic, dyslexic, and has PTSD and behavior disorders, anxiety and probably depression too.  He isn't one of those on the spectrum who seems "retarded" right away; when you first meet him he seems normal... until you get him talking.  Autistic people tend to talk incessantly about things they care about, they are in their own world and don't pick up social cues like a neuro-typical person would.  He also has some physical attributes of ASD such as wide-open eyes and spastic movements.

The trouble is, he won't let me take him to the doctor.  He needs diagnosis and treatment, therapy, anger management.  He could get on disability, which would cover his room and board.  I offered to take him and be his payee and do all the paperwork for him because I know he has a hard time with paperwork, but still he refuses.  He wants to continue to live as a transient scavenger.  He doesn't seem to understand (or care) that society can't have him living like that and he will end up in jail.  He can't manage his emotions, his behavior, his temper, his time or money, his belongings, his life.  He isn't normal.  And we have a lifetime of documented incidents to prove it.

A couple years ago he was arrested and beaten by police just for being himself.  Strangers misunderstand him and are afraid of him.  People call the cops on him all the damn time.  He is loud and unruly.  And nobody knows that he is autistic.

In the meantime, all we do is fight.  He throws temper tantrums and makes messes.  He is a 42 year old toddler who disturbs the neighbors.

I am at my wits end.  How do you help someone who won't be helped?

*My brother wanted to own a house, so he bought the cheapest one he could find on craigslist.  And it's in Caribou, a 6 hour drive away.  So he technically owns a house, but he also owes property taxes, and can't hold a job, and can't afford the utilities so he can't live there in the winter.  So the house just sits there accumulating debt and will probably be taken from him.